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вторник, 8 мая 2018 г.

Murmansk forever or Rabinovich and Angela

Angelica was constantly tormented by depression, neither pills nor psychoanalysts could not help her anymore. It seemed like she was getting the depressions out of the closet, was wearing it for a while, then she took off and put on a new one. Depression from loneliness, depression from dissatisfaction with boredom from lack of money from excess money, it is easy to wear one, it easily puts on another. It seemed that this beautiful and successful woman from New York was missing, but she lacked everything.One fine day Angelica decides what needs to be cardinal, what to change. She took out the globe and decided that where her finger would go down there she would go. Closing her eyes, Anzhelika twisted the globe several times and after the ball stopped poking its miniature finger into it.
-Murmansk-she read it on the globe.
It's cold in Russia, bears go, drink vodka and the harsh people play the balalaika-that's all Angelica knew about this mysterious country. Angelica realized that this is a sign from above, after all, what could be the depression in Russia?
Gathering her suitcases, Angelica went to Russia.
The first shock happened at the airport with the strange name "Domodedovo". Angelica saw the lovely smiling people not at all what she heard from the American media, where the Russians appeared in an aggressive image who wanted to destroy the civilized world. A short transplant and she arrives in Murmansk. Having landed at the airport in Murmansk, she catches a taxi with a big picture of a tank and strange slogans "To Berlin". Angelica believes that this is probably a tankosalon advertisement for the sale of tanks. How interesting Angelica thinks in the most free country in the US is impossible to buy a tank, but here they are advertised and offered to buy, it becomes more interesting. At the entrance to the city, Angelica notices that there are many dead people on the roadside and it's strange that no one picks them up. She wanted to ask the taxi driver about this, but to her regret except for "thank you" and "hello" she did not know anything especially the driver kept leading some important negotiations and answered all the questions with one phrase posla na hui suka.
At last Angelica came to the hotel. This, of course, was shock to her because she saw such hotels only in the series "Zombie Rise," but she noticed that her depression was completely depressed. Having settled in the hotel, Angelica decides to walk around the neighborhood. Walking through the park, she notices a man in the bushes with no signs of life. She tries to call for help people, but no one around. After walking a little more she sees another dead man. Angelica starts panic, probably a nuclear war has begun and she will now be taken hostage. Suddenly she notices a woman, Angelica rushes to her and tries to explain the situation, but from the woman he hears only the phrase posla na hui suka. Probably this inconsolable widow of one of these men, thinks Angelica.
Angelica goes on and stumbles on another corpse, she tries to feel for the pulse, but he does not feel it. From the bag gets a mirror and sticks it to the mouth of the victim.
-On a miracle, she sees evaporation, tries to shake the person in response, wheezing. Angelica tries to lift a man with a tattoo on his arm in the form of the sun and the letters "VASYA" and she succeeds. She takes out the perfume "Chanel No. 5" and wipes Vasily's face from dog shit.
The hereditary nobleman Vasily would never raise his hand on a fragile girl, but Angelica begins to be doubly suspicious, and then to triple. Basil, as usual in such situations with shouts posla na hui suka, beats Angelica in the left eye from which she flies a meter to three in the bushes. Vasily from the throat drinks "Chanel No. 5" and with the song "Get up a huge country went to a mortal battle ..." goes into the distance.
Angelica's whole life runs before her eyes, after she sees a tunnel and a bright light. Opening her eyes, she sees the hospital ward and bent over her an unshaven, but washed man with a badge Alex Rabinovich New York State Hospital.
Alex Rabinovich is such a legendary personality that it would be a crime not to talk about him.
Alex Rabinovich is also Sanka Rubik, a native of the hero city of Odessa. He received the nickname Rubik not from the abbreviated surname Rabinovich, but from the fact that in his youth he collected two sides of the Rubik's cube in 5 minutes, which delighted local grandmothers, they also called him Sashka Einstein. And in what that they were right as to be arranged in hospital of New York on a post of the nurse with diplomas the plaster-lining of 4 discharges written out in colony of Bobruisk could only the person with brains of Einstein. Of course, even this would not help Rubik stay on this post for a long time, but fate brought him to Gabon Mganba, a resident of Gabon, who told him that as soon as you were dismissed shouting to everyone that they were dewy. Robinovich could have done this, but he was not black, but he had Einstein's brain (as he believed), and in the phrase "you all rosists" changed the words of the rosista to anti-Semites and everything turned out Rabinovich and Mganba divided the hospital. In one side worked and adjusted blankets nurse Mganba, and in the other straightened the blankets and wished all the good nurse Alex Rabinovich, because they could do nothing more. But back to our patient.
Alex Rabinovich bent over the patient, adjusting the blanket. Angelica took Rubik's hand.
-Doctor, shall I live?
-Don't worry, everything will be fine (do not worry, everything will be fine), this is the only phrase that Rabinovich said to everyone without an accent.
-Doctor what does the word "posla na hui suka" mean?
Wow what kind of pills she ate, will come to consciousness need to learn the brand, thought Robinovich.
-Don't worry, everything will be fine- repeated Rabinovich leaving the ward.
Almost the end.
P.S. Angelica left the hospital more from her, she was never depressed, since she had a mission to bring to Murmansk residents about the forthcoming nuclear apocalypse.
Rabinovich learned about the magic tablets of Angelica, but he did not achieve any positive result from them.
the end
http://newssvet.blogspot.com

понедельник, 15 августа 2016 г.

Олимпиада в Рио Особое мнение

Вот смотрю я на тех, кто смотрит эту вашу Олимпиаду, и офигеваю.
Странно, что вы не понимаете. Любой зрелищный спорт - суррогат и атавизм животного прошлого, где "наша стая круче всех". Практической пользы от него нет никакой: от того, что условный Вася Пупкин прыгнет на полсантиметра выше условного Джона Смита, в нашем мире ровным счётом ничего не изменится.
Вы мне, конечно, возразите: "Ты не понимаешь, какого труда, сколько здоровья и пота стоит каждая медаль!" Да ни хрена она не стоит. После получения страной этой медали зарплаты у людей не повысятся, рабочие места не создадутся, лекарство от рака не изобретётся, асфальт на улице не вырастет, а ваши замечательные соседи не прекратят пить "чернила", орать песни под окнами и ссать в подъездах. Практического смысла в этой медали - ноль.
Даже наоборот: за каждую, например, золотую Лукашенко обещал выплатить по 150 тысяч $ и традиционно подарить спортсмену квартиру. За счёт наших (да-да, username, и твоих тоже) налогов, штрафов, акцизов, пошлин и т.п.
А больным детям будем и дальше SMS-ками на лечение собирать...
В общем, ничего более бессмысленного, чем когда нищие идиоты с трибун и у телевизоров "болеют" за миллионеров на спортивных аренах, лично я себе и представить не могу.
Нет, я не против спорта - кто хочет, пусть тренируется, соревнуется, тратит здоровье, жизнь и ресурсы на бессмысленные сантиметры и секунды. Но любую поддержку этого быдло-шоу из госбюджета следует жёстко запретить. Пусть бы доказывали себе и друг другу "кто круче" за свой собственный счёт.
А деньги нужно вкладывать в развитие нации. Образование, здравоохранение, науку, культуру, рабочие места и современные высокодоходные производства.
Согласны?.. Или хотите дальше дрочить на телевизор, повторяя себе "Пофиг, что я нищий и больной неудачник с зарплатой в 150$, живущий в стране с ментами-беспредельщиками, избивающими врачей-педиатров, и президентом-колхозником, не знающим ни одного языка! Зато наш Вася сегодня в Рио золотую медаль в настольном теннисе взял! Мы крутые! Ура!"
Не в этом соревноваться надо. А в технологиях, зарплатах, медицине, культуре, уровне жизни - всём том, что несёт нам развитие и помогает эволюционировать. Уж никак не в бессмысленных прыжках, забегах и заплывах, не дающих нам ровным счётом ничего.